Spiraling out of Control
I'm spiraling. How do I know I am clinically depressed? I'm this close to letting myself sleep permanently. I'm sorry to say out of the blue.
People are going to relate to you to make you feel better. I'm going to try to give you a other reason to live outside yourself. The real reason to never kill yourself, the reason it's been illegal in most societies, is because of the people you will leave behind. To be quite blunt, life isn't about you. That's not to say you're self centered, more-so that it's easy to become oblivious to exactly how important you are. I don't care who you are, it's irrelevant, people will be broken for the rest of their lives because of that decision. Doesnt matter if you think you hate everyone or that not a soul will notice. They will. You'll hurt them so bad. The worst part of all of that is they will think they could have done something to stop it when they couldn't have, because you CHOSE to do it. You've got a lot to live for. A divine light that could shine if you were honest and brave enough to voice it properly and morally. One that would uplift you and everyone else and you know it. It's okay to be scared and there is no time limit. Have a blessed journey. Find ways to remind yourself. For me, if I'm asked what my goal is in life, the answer is stumbling toward The Kingdom of God.
"Stumble away, but don't you ever quit.
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