3.Recognising The Sign Of Being A People-Pleaser
by# Khushboo Chaudhary
You have a low opinion of yourself. You may believe people only care about you when you’re useful, and need their praise and appreciation in order to feel good about yourself.
You need others to like you. You often spend a lot of time worrying about rejection. These worries often lead to specific actions designed to keep people happy with you so they don’t reject you.
It’s hard for you to say “no”. You might worry that saying someone “no” or turning down a request for help will make them think you don’t care about them even if you don’t actually have the time or inclination to help.
Are you always ready with a “sorry!” when something goes wrong? People-pleasing involves readiness to take on blame, even when what happened has nothing to do with you.
You’re quick to agree, even when you don’t really agree. Agreeability often seems like a sure-fire way to win approval.
You struggle with authenticity. You often have a harder time recognising how you really feel. Continuing to push your own needs to the side makes it harder to acknowledge them. Eventually, you might not even feel sure about what you want or how to be true to yourself. You also may not be able to voice the feelings you are aware of, even when you want to speak up for yourself.
You’re a giver. Do you like giving to others? More importantly, do you give with a goal of being liked? You might give and give, hoping people will reciprocate with the affection and love you desire.
You don’t have any free time. Take a look at how you spend your free time. After taking care of essential responsibilities, such as work, chores, and childcare, what’s left for you? Do you have time for hobbies and relaxation?
“Sometimes you aren’t listening to your body because you’re listening to everybody else’s expectations.” ― Ann Voskamp
Arguments and conflict upset you. To avoid the anger of people, you might rush to apologize or do whatever you think will make them happy, even when they’re not angry at you.
If you identify with the above, there are things you can do to stop being a people-pleaser. First you need to know what causing you to be a People-Pleaser.