Narc as mothers

Unknowns Quesrion:

Why do some narcissistic mothers pick favourites, and then victimize and bully her least favourite child?

Teams answer:

In my experience, my N-mother did this because I wasn't like her and I wouldn't indulge in her delusions, lies, and craziness. My N-sister, who is one of her flying monkeys, would sneer at me “why do you have to be so different? Why do you ALWAYS have to start trouble?” My other malignant N-sister would fly into narcissistic rages whenever I would stand up to our N-mother, and yell and scream and shame me into getting back into my place, the scapegoat. From the beginning, my N-mother always favored my younger sisters. At one point my N-mother and her second ex-husband moved down the street from my N-sister, and my father commented “I guess you never want your older sister to move near you" and laughed. When my sister asked him why he said that he replied “your mother and sister have ALWAYS had a difficult relationship, even when your sister was a baby.” Figure that one out. I took it to mean, my mother has hated me since I was a baby. She would even tell me how the only time I was a “good child" was when I was a baby and would sleep through the night. I guess that's how she liked me, asleep, quiet, with no opinions and no actual interaction with her on my part. She would constantly say how I was bound and determined to drive her crazy from the moment I could walk. I've always been very different from my mother, and she's said that she had girls because she wanted “mini-me’s”. I guess I was a huge disappointment because I was never her “mini-me.” I spent the first 40 years of my life apologizing for just being me. I won't apologize anymore.

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Toni

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