A Silent Mess
Your brain won't switch off. It grabs a memory here then a sentence there, bits and pieces of long forgotten hurt, woken up to haunt you, all over again. You know the broken road it is going down, and you try to stop it. But to no avail. Your hurt gets ripped out from their deep dark layer where you have put them not to be called upon again...
You wonder about your self worth. You hear the cruel words, refrain through passages of a very dark brain, grabbing onto these words and memories as if they were a long forgotten lover.
You sit and laugh about things that aren't registering. Because your mind is busy giving itself a tongue lashing, and it won't stop until first blood is drawn. Your mask is on on the outside everything is fine, you respond with the right sentences and facial expressions but inside you are a "silent mess". Screaming to stop to go back to normal, your normal. For the memories and words that hurt to go back to their deep dark depths, but the harder you try to put them back, the more they boil over.
Your mask is busy slipping, everything gets ripped apart. You see anger, where there is none. You hear harshness in the tones of their voices, and your mind tells you what did i do know, trying to grabbed on to what you did wrong for him to be mad again. You analyze and dissect every word spoken, everything you did. At neck break speed, because you have to know what you did wrong. And your brain don't spare you, bringing back everything, every little memory of his disapprovel his anger and your mind in all it's cruelness just keeps on buzzing making sure you remembered the past, the present, and the future.
All in a Silent Mess which is called your mind.
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